surrender through suffering

Speaking of surrender (Waterloo), I found the following writing posted online at one of the forums I read. It goes to the heart of why we in 1st world countries have such a difficult time understanding the importance of surrender in living our lives here on earth. I believe the abundant life is accessed through surrender. If we tend to have a fix-it/controlling type personality, we hinder our own surrender. We oppress the parts of us that we hate, deny, or fear. Our image-possessed culture, whether in church or out, teaches us to protect this illusion.

For us 1st world people, these hidden parts are best exposed through pain and trauma. Disillusionment is not far behind. We then are presented with an opportunity to confront "our weak spot" or spots, as in my case. But it is only an opportunity. It won't happen on its own. We chose whether to confront or continue to deny. Here's the writing:

SUFFERING

What is the oppressed part of your being?

Do you realize with what difficulty surrender will come to a fixing,
managing mentality? There's nothing in that psyche prepared to
understand the spiritual wisdom of surrender. All of the great world
religions teach surrender. Yet most of us, until we go through the
hole in our soul, "our weak spot in the middle", we just don't think
surrender is necessary. At least that's how it is for those of us in
First World countries. The poor, on the other hand, seem to
understand limitation at a very early age.

The Third World faces its limitation through a breakdown in the social-economic system. But we have to face our limitations, it seems, in the interior world. That's our liberation theology. We must recognize our own poor man, our own abused woman, the oppressed part of ourselves that we hate, that we deny, that we're afraid of. That's the hole in our soul. It's the way through, maybe the only way, says the crucified Jesus. (from Breathing Under Water by Richard Rohr)